When I think of Halloween, I have very mixed emotions. As a child, I never liked Halloween. I was about 9 years old, before I went trick or treating. I was always scared of the Halloween costumes and the people in them. I liked the candy but could do without the rest of the customs.
My mother also hated Halloween. Missing Halloween was never a problem for Mama. It was not in her nature to like the scary or ugly things in life. She was always glad when the night was over. I guess I picked up on her vibes, because I have never been a big fan of the day.
It is odd that 2 of the most important days in my life happened on Halloween. The first was when Tommy asked me to marry him--the other was a year later when my grandfather died and was buried on Halloween.
Tommy asking me to marry him was a big surprise...or treat indeed. We had talked about getting married and had even made vague plans however, when he slipped the engagement ring on my finger, I knew it was really going to happen. We would be married soon and be together for the rest of our lives.
It was right in the middle of the Vietnam War and our lives,and our country were completely unsettled. He didn't want to go to war and leave me, not knowing how he would return.
I didn't want to be left. He was a soldier and I wanted to be his wife, no matter what.
His commanding officer settled the whole thing for us. He told Tommy that he was not going to Vietnam and to get married and be happy. That was all it took. Two months later, we were married. Six months later we were expecting a baby and moving to Yuma, Arizona. Life can change on a dime.
I was about 7 months pregnant with Lisa, when Tommy received a phone call from my father, telling him that my grandfather, Harry Poe, had died suddenly that morning. It was Oct.29,1970.
When Tommy started to tell me about Granddaddy, I got excited. I thought they had flown to Yuma to see us. In my excitement, I wouldn't let him finish telling me the news. He got tears in his eyes and then he told me.
I cried so hard. Lisa was kicking and then suddenly she got still and it felt like time stopped for both of us. Tommy called our doctor and he said under no circumstances was I to fly home. The chances of me loosing the baby were too great. I was too upset and emotional to make such a long trip. So we stayed in Yuma.
Earlier that day, I had received $20 from Mamamae and Granddaddy in the mail. It was to go on the baby furniture we had on layaway. Tommy said, that we should go on and get the baby furniture and assemble it the next day. We did.
It was with mixed feelings that we put the crib together. I was excited to have it home and actually see where our baby would lay. But at the same time I was so sad because while we were planning for a new life, my family was planning my grandfather's funeral.
We got it all assembled and rearranged our room. I remember, Aunt Donna had crossed stitched us a baby quilt. Uncle Gene, put the last stitch in the quilt, making the quilt extra special. I still have it. When I placed it on the bed, it was perfect.
Granddaddy never got to see Lisa, but Mama was there for her birth, and Mamamae visited us the following week after Lisa was born. It was an exciting time for us all. They stayed several weeks with us. It was a healing time. We needed Lisa. We, as a family, needed the joy she brought back into our lives.
Granddaddy, Mamamae and Mama are all gone now, but their memory will live on as long as the people who loved them share their stories.
I intend to tell bits and pieces of their lives. Things that were important to me. Things that I don't want forgotten.
Now I have a new reason to celebrate. My grandchildren, Jacy and Logan. They make Halloween fun again. Time has passed, healing has come and we can once again enjoy the oddest of all holidays--Halloween.
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