Thoughts on "Gift From the Sea"

At least every two or three years I reread Anne Morrow Lindbergh's book, " Gift From the Sea". It is a book that has resonated with me, since the first time I read it years ago.

I have probably read this book twenty times. For me,
it is one woman sharing with another woman a truth she learned about life. 

They could easily be sitting at a small table, looking out the window of a small weathered house toward the beach. Sharing coffee, donuts and bits of their life. Mostly, just letting the ocean do the talking, to each of them in their own way.

The author slowly reveals a truth, and at times a very painful lesson for each of us to learn, "that a woman must come of age by herself--she must find her true center alone." This takes time. Anne, was a wealthy woman and still yearned for "alone time." She could afford to pay for it, but it was never enough. She, like most women longed for more and wanted it all.


For most women, including herself, this is almost impossible. We are caretakers, mothers, wives, friends, employees and volunteers. That leaves very little room for exploring oneself. However, sooner or later the day will come and the question will be asked by 99% of all women, "when is my time?"


Anne compares the stages of her life to the seashells she finds on her island. A place she goes once a year to be alone.  A place to regroup, to clear her head and find that" wanting spot" inside her that never goes away.  


I envied her every time I read that book until just recently.  I wanted or longed to be able to get away from all the pressures of life for a week. A week of solitude 20 years ago, would have been worth a million dollars to me.


I loved my family, my life, but there were times I felt like I could not breathe.  Everything was going so fast. There was no time to rest or relax for more than 20 minutes. I longed for a day alone. A day to do as I pleased--no strings attached. A week would have been indescribable.

Finally, I have found the time, the place and the space.  For me it is a place that I eventually earned. After the children where grown and happy, I began to relax. I didn't worry as much about them. I enjoyed them as adults and friends.


I eventually retired from a job that I really did like. Tommy and I started a new phase in our relationship. We spend quality time together and apart. Each doing probably for the first time in our lives, things we really want to do, without having to second guess our motives or how it will affect someone else.  This has become our "island time" of life.


It would have been nice to have had "island time" 20 or 30 years ago. Most people can't afford that luxury. I know I couldn't.  However, the wait is worth it.


My life is mine now. I write when I want to, which has become my passion. It was always there. My life was just so loud and hectic I couldn't hear my muse. Now we spend a lot of time together. 

The ideas that come to my mind, come so fast it is as though they are trying to play catch up for 30 years of silence. 


The picture above is a sketch by Ron Berry of Naples, Fla. I have met him and he is a very gifted artist and a humble man. This drawing symbolizes for me this time in my "creative life".  My time---at last.

One of my favorite people, Liz Jewell, made a comment the other day that absolutely sums up life--- "We can have it all----just not all at once." I love that quote. It is the essence of my life....for now.