Another Desire Checked off my Bucket List---Moonshine

For years I have kept a "Bucket List" of  things I want to do or see before I die. Some things have been major adventures.  Others were small things that had escaped my grasp in the past, however I still wanted the experience.  This is where entry number 154-- 'drink moonshine', comes in.

I was born and raised in Kentucky. A state known for making "moonshine or White Lightning".  It has been brewed for years in every area of the state. It was completely illegal.  I was told that my great grandfather went to prison for selling moonshine.  As soon as he got out of prison, the 'still' was up and running again. Pappy Owens was back in business!!!

I have seen movies about making and drinking moonshine. I heard the stories and tales as I was growing up. I knew the folklore.  I just didn't know anyone who would actually give me a drink of it.  So I added it to my 'to do list' and I waited.

This past May, my wait was over.  Someone had given my son in law a jar of 190 proof moonshine.  It was in a small mason jar and looked like water.  It was sitting in the back of the refrigerator waiting, like a spider waits in it's web.  And along I came and opened the door. I held the jar in my hands, examining it and wondering what I was getting myself into. This is about the time the 'spider' smiles. He knows he has won round one.

Lisle poured all of us a 'shot' of shine.  On the count of four we were all to drink and empty our glass in one gulp. Sounded easy. On the count of four, we all took a drink. Tommy, Lisle and Lisa swallowed theirs in one swift swoop.  Mine got stuck and I had to take two swallows to get it down. I coughed, sputtered, gasped, stomped and felt like my throat was going to explode into fire!!!!   Round 2! The spider is laughing uncontrollably.

 Never in my life have I drunk anything even remotely close to that God awful concoction. I felt it slide down my throat and hit my stomach!!   Wham!!!!  My stomach was on fire, so was my throat and my nose!!!  My insides were literally feeling like liquid fire. It was a strange, gross feeling. Round 3. The spider flipped us all off!!!

 Lisa was in as bad a shape as I was. We were coughing, hacking, grabbing water, blowing our noses and wiping tears....all at the same time.  And still it continued to lite me up. After the 'fire' went out, the 190 proof found some spot in my brain and began to play tag with the rest of the loose cells running around up there.  About 20 minutes later I was back to normal....the match was over.  All the rounds went to the spider, who knew the outcome before the adventure began.

Tommy and Lisle insisted that we were sissies and that the moonshine was 'smooth'.  Bullshit!!!  The only "smooth" place was the top of the jar!

Am I glad I tried it?  You bet!!  Would I do it again---not on your life!!  I checked that puppy off my list, and smiled when I did it!! 

How anyone drinks that liquor on a daily basis is beyond me. They either have stomachs made of cast iron or no stomach at all.  Either way, I do not believe anyone can live a long life based on moonshine, without a whole lot of luck.

 I also know this is a common way of life for some folks. That is one of the main reasons I lock my doors when we are driving through the Appalachian Mountains. The effects of moonshine and also the fact that I have seen  "Deliverance"--one time too many makes me just a little bit leery!  


I am glad I can check number 154 off my list. It was an experience I will never forget. It surpassed my expectations, living up to it's name "White Lightning".....and the spider smiled.