The Hardest Card She Never Bought

   Sunday is Father's Day.  It is a special day to give recognition and gratitude to father's for the part each man played in the life of his family. It is the time to acknowledge the respect and love shown by fathers over the years. It should be a happy day. However, for some people, this is a day of mixed emotions.               While shopping in WalMart the other day, buying cards and a gift, I watched a young woman trying to buy a card for her father or for the father of her child or both men.  Something about the young woman touched my heart and caught my imagination.  She had a little girl, about 2 years old in her cart waiting patiently.  The child was sucking her thumb while watching me watch her mom. She swung her legs and twirled her dark curly hair with one finger. She was slowly getting sleepy.
   I didn't know the young woman.  However, within 30 minutes of watching her try to buy a Father's Day card, I knew a lot about her.  She cries easily in public. She wasn't a happy person.  The message on the card was very important to her. All of the messages she read cut her to the bone with an invisible knife. She bled tears over words she did not write.
   Over and over she would pick up a card, read it, cry and slam the card back where it originally belonged. The longer she stood there the more unconcerned she became about where the card should be replaced.
  The longer she read, the sadder she became. She could find nothing that expressed her feelings. Cards of caring, reliability, help, unconditional love, pride, acceptance and always being there for her through the years were cards she could not buy. They were lies and she could no longer sign her name to another lie. Finally, she looked at her little girl, gave her a kiss on top of the head and walked off to another aisle. She never knew I was standing there.
  As I started to walk away, I began to think about how important fathers are to their children.  A father teaches a little boy how to be a man.  A father is the first man his daughter will love.  Through his eyes, she will see herself probably for the rest of her life. His words will forever be the recording that plays in her mind...loop, after loop.  He lays the framework for a love life with another man years down the road. This man will have to love her back to health.
  Buying a card for someone you love or want to love should not cause you despair, frustration or make you cry. Some man or men missed an opportunity to make this young woman feel loved and of value. She continues fighting the same old battle over and over again.
  I hope she finds what she is looking for soon. I hope there is a second chance in her near future.  It doesn't take long for a year to roll around and she will find herself repeating these same actions once again until a change is made.  Until forgiveness happens and respect is restored, or until she lets go of her idea of what a father should be, and moves on with her life; accepting the fact that not all men should be fathers. It has nothing to do with her.
  If I knew where this young woman lived, I would send her this card however, I don't. Hopefully, someday she will look in the mirror and like what she sees regardless of what she hears in her recorded memory.